The Yellow Bird


one should not be
too careless with love

when the yellow bird perches
on finger tip, do not flick
it away; do not be crass

thank it for coming
ask it to stay

birds flutter and fly
they shift and peddle

small jerks and shifting eyes
they are not meant to keep still

but let it stay
as long as it likes

and allow it the sky
when it chooses to take wing

must i


i stayed up too late
nursing aches
that can’t be seen

the sun is sharp
in the window
beckoning

for two hours
i linger
hidden in bed frame
and red sheets

skin tight
too many nerves
not enough bone

i want to
stay pinned like
butterfly to board

preserved in
my solemnity

It is too much
to ask

must
I rise
every time

Speech

I’ve been thirsting to talk
for so long all my stories
choke in my throat. I am
speechless; it is not rare.

Speech was never my best
quality. So lend me your
ear, only so I can lean my
lips beside it. Lend me your
pitch because mine is pinched
and numb with in mouth.

Listen to me. I need to know
there is something worth the
weight on tongue. I need to know
there is a purpose to this act.

Faith alone, is not enough.
cropped-cropped-rabbit2.png

When I see you

I count
backwards
from sixty;

take turns
breathing life
in and out

like the moon
pulls her tides.

I try to hold
air in lungs.

I try to
stop this
involuntary reflex.

The compulsion
to fight or flight.

The urge to
lose myself
in stale memories.

I try to
overlook this
heart I left
soaking in
jars of
formaldehyde
awaiting
resurrection.

It is far
too easy
to reclaim the
fleeting fervor
of yesteryear

in
quick anticipated
gasps held in chest.

It is best
to release
air from lungs,
count down,
breathe.

cropped-rabbit1.png

Wounds

I don’t want
to forget you.

I know
it will happen.

Space creates distance,
creates forgetfulness,

changes the tone
of our voices
till they are no longer
recognizable.

I wish I still had
a photograph
of you in my mind.

The one with you
in flannel and frown
looking after me
as I drove away.

I had hoped
to always remember,
despite oceans and deserts,
the way I hung on your lip
and sunk into your skin.

I never wanted the memory of
the strength of your arms,

the kindness in your touch,
the colors of your eyes
offering secrets and comforts,

all the reasons I told you
I would always love you

to slip from heart and mind.

I wish I still had
that slash in my heart
that bared your name.

The one time healed.
The one forgetfulness
is taking from me.

Not all wounds
are asked to mend,
some I would like to keep,
run my fingers
over scar tissue,
and smile
in sweet memory
of a man who
once gave me
the world.

backdrop

Dragonfly girl

I am the sound of
flapping wings
when no birds
are seen.

I am backdrop,
waiting in alcove
for a cue that has
never come.

I recognize the
vague expression when
I say my name
for the third time
but my ego has been
checked so many times
I can only surrender a
smile of compliance.

Was there ever
a time I wasn’t
easily forgotten?

I am a walk on,
a sideways glance,
a choked confession
moments too late.

Perhaps if I
took the time
to reinvent
myself I would
be able to
leave more
noticeable
footprints.

I can’t help
but to beg to
scar this world
in the worse
possible way
just to be
remembered.

Coastline

You can tell by the
arch of my back
I can keep afloat
long after the moon
rips her tides.

I am a better
swimmer than
most land
bound creatures.

I am resistant to
regain straight
legged pose.
I could never balance
well on dry land.

I am more elegant
in the surf.

I thought it
was the only way to
feel free until
my waves met your shore.

I did not grip
to your coast
because I thought
I would drown.

I held
on because I
couldn’t bare
to let you go.